In the summer of 2000, I had just finished high school. As I did every year, I went to church camp at Lake Louise in Boyne Falls Michigan. That summer however is burned into my heart memory. That was the summer I heard my call to ordained ministry.
I grew up a United Methodist! The church was in my backyard, and my great-grandparents were the first to introduce our family to the church. I have many fond memories of the Frankfort-Elberta Parish of the UMC in Michigan. Many of the church family became extended family in our small town. They supported me throughout my high school adventures and to this day still reaches out to me as a clergy person. In fact, several clergy came out of Frankfort United Methodist Church.
The call to ministry wasn’t some big booming voice. I don’t know if God sounds like bass or a soprano. Yet, it was a calm peace and assurance that overwhelmed when I heard, “this is what you’re gonna do for the rest of your life” as I served communion to my camp mates. For me, this calling is a gift. It leveled the playing field among people my own age.
Being an introvert, it has always been a bit of a challenge to make friends. I didn’t have a lot in common with people from my generation back then. Today, life is a little bit easier. My circle includes a lot of people of faith from every generation – people who believe in the radical love of their higher power. With my calling, it was profound for me then, and still is today – that we don’t have to get along to be welcomed at the same table. We don’t have to believe the same to break bread together. We don’t even have to like each other to care about each other.
I entered college knowing that I was going into the ministry. One of the steps in the ordination process is an annual review by either a district committee or conference board of ordained ministry. Those interviews were tough. There were always questions about call – ‘have others told you you would be good in ministry?’ There were always questions about grace – ‘when did you have no doubt who God was in your life?’ Near the end of the ordination process, 14 years later, (and 2 years longer than normal) I’ll never forget the ah-ha moment when I began to articulate my understanding of Wesley’s Regeneration in my life.
On a beautiful day, June 14, 2014, Bishop Deb Kiesey and the conference leadership at the time laid hands on me as I joined the long line of clergy before me and ordained me as an Elder in the United Methodist Church. My 14 year journey took me from community college and our family business to the New Orleans as I sat with a man who was dying of Aids. From there I entered seminary and found my way to the Short North district of Columbus Ohio. I learned quickly that no one wants to hear about the ‘bread of life’ in Jesus Christ when their stomachs are growling. No one wants to hear about hearts strangly warmed when they just spent a cold night in the street. Around the time I was preparing for a 2 week immersion in El Salvador, I met my partner in this beautiful calling – Mike. Together, we have done it all in the church: fried fish, battled giant mosquitoes at church camp, served in mission in Mexico, grieved the losses, celebrated the victories and worshipped holding the hymnal together. We have learned new skills like guitar playing, tech support, and the art of empathy over a cup of coffee (which we didn’t really care for when we started out together).
10 years ago I heard the words: “Cathy, take authority, as an elder to preach the Word of God, to administer the Holy Sacraments and to order the life of the Church; in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.” Those words marked the culmination of a 14 year process of growing, learning and maturing in faith. In the secular world, one might say that I had to pay my dues. In the church world, I am grateful that I didn’t walk that journey alone. These words also marked the beginning of something anew.
I’ve been under appointment in the United Methodist Church since 2007. This June, it’s been 17 years. (7 of those as a local pastor and provisional member of conference.) Never could I imagine how amazing this journey would be. After ordination, service in the church felt different. That first Sunday in the pulpit after ordination, I had on my stole and before any words were spoken my congregation gave me a standing ovation. I can close my eyes and still hear that round of applause. They had an amazing celebration that day that included one of our dearest mentors and friends preaching on the call of ministry so that could soak up every moment of that holy day. Their gift to me was my Advent stole that I still wear to this day.
The significance of ordination gave me a stronger voice in the Church. It is a lasting reminder of the journey that I was on for all those years. It is also a responsibility to uphold the integrity of the polity and theology that shaped who I am as a United Methodist Christian. Have I been perfect along the way? Certainly not. I make mistakes everyday. As my counselor asked me, “do you feel called?” My response was: “no doubt.” As I recall the weight of the hands on my head, I don’t feel them as a burden. Rather, they remind me of the verse that is on my ordination banner from Mark 4:25-41- “who is this, even the wind and the waves obey him?” He speaks, waves his hand, give the storm “the look.” Ordination was an experience that I am still working towards understaning everyday. I am confident that God is right there with me!
To celebrate my 10 year ordination anniversary, I took advantage of a local photographer’s request for 40 women over 40 for a photo galley showing. The only other time in my life I was dressed up that fancy was my wedding day. It was an amazing experience. It was fun to bring my most favorite items of clothing and have them captured in a very special way! (It was reminicent of my grandma’s “Glamor Shots” from the 90s!) The photos below were my 4 favorites from the day. I can’t wait to see what the next decade of ordained ministry looks like! In 3 years, I’ll will be celebrating 20 years under appointment. I can’t believe it!
Stephanie asked me during my photo shoot and video recording – what advice would I give my younger self. My answer was “the hard stuff is worth it.” There are days when I say, “I didn’t go to seminary for this.” There are days when I think – “a 9 to 5 job would be nice.” Yet, I wouldn’t be true to my call. The hard stuff is worth it. It leads to life changing relationships.
Thank you Steph Shanks Photography for inspiring this blog post!
Facing the Storm with Faith 