This week, I was asked to meet for coffee with someone (not from my current church). I usually prepare ahead of time for these types of meetings, but this one I didn’t. I didn’t ask “what are we meeting about.” I had some assumptions – and my assumptions were wrong.
In the course of 5 minutes, our conversation went from cordial to condemnation.
It wasn’t truly anything new. The rhetoric of – “God’s word says…” There was a reference to Revelations. I’ve heard it all before as a woman, young person, and ally. What was most painful about this, however, was that it came from out of no where.
I am choosing to reflect on this incident here because it was an act of spiritual bullying. It was an act that is doing harm daily. If it wasn’t this person, it would have been another. (It wasn’t the first time and it won’t be the last.) I try to remain partisan during the political season. This is something that I don’t have to be quiet about. In the moment, I didn’t have some quick response. I defended my personal faith with courage, and a bit of (wth) confusion in my voice. This was NOT ok.
I am so grateful for emotional the response of my closest friends and family members. This was NOT ok.
Here’s what I crafted tonight as a response. YOU ARE LOVED. YOU ARE CREATED IN THE IMAGE OF GOD. YOU ARE WORTHY OF GRACE.
To Christian who Believes that I am going to Hell (for whatever reason):
That is such a heavy burden for you to carry. Jesus took the weight of the world with him on the cross. With his resurrection, he showed us that there is true freedom in him! There is hope. There is no need for you to be burdened by this responsibility.
My heavy weight is not in my fear of hell but rather in my anger at you. You, and others like you, are doing damage to the Christian faith that I preach, teach, believe in and live by every day, and have for my entire life. You are the reason that people are turning away from the Church and our beloved Christian faith everyday. People do not want to be told they are going to hell.
I set out every day with the intention that my anger with you isn’t going to come out as hate, violence or even condemnation. I fail sometimes. I bite my tongue at politics. I’ve been bullied by spiritual bullies for my entire career. I do my best to be kind when I see you in the grocery store. I do my best to be kind, to you (and defend our faith in Jesus), when someone reaches out for love, and the first thing they have to ask me is if I am one of “those” Christians. I do my best to not bad mouth you. My humanity gets in the way. I know that I am not perfect. Those are the days that I need a little extra help. I thank God for the grace that pours out when I need it.
If you are reading this, and have ever said to me – “women can’t be pastors”, “you’re leading them wrong”, or “the word of God says…” this is for you. Women can be pastors. (In fact, ALL people can be pastors. If you are not called to be a clergy person, your ministry area is your life – your work – your home. You are doing God’s work!) If leading my churches down the roads of love is wrong, I don’t wanna be right. It is so much more freeing to love than to hold on to the burden of judgement and hate. The greatest commandments are to love God and love our neighbors as God loves them. The word of God speaks each time I read the words in red – the words of Jesus Christ. John 1:1 says, “in the beginning was the word, and the word was with God and the word WAS God.” (Take a look at the original translation of this passage.)
If you’re reading this and feeling burdened by something in life, let’s talk. Our faith in Jesus Christ gives us the freedom to face each day anew! I’d love to share this love with you!
With love,
Me
Facing the Storm with Faith 